Dying of the Light
by E. Wallace
Summary: A family deals with a fatal diagnosis. Warning: character death to come: no misdiagnosis, no miracle cure. If this upsets you, you might want to stop reading now. Third in the Accidental Trilogy - see attempted explanation inside.
1. Diagnosis

I wrote three stories which turned into a trilogy even though that was never my intent... mostly because I wrote them out of order. I apologize for any headaches caused by my attempts to explain how it all happened.

**Third in the Accidental Trilogy**

This was written as a sort of sequel to 'Enciente'... it became a trilogy when I couldn't keep myself from using a couple of elements from 'Healing'.

oxo

Disclaimer: Paramount - if they knew what to do with them, they wouldn't get so ticked about our little efforts.

Dying of the Light  
By E. Wallace  
1999

Part 1

Diagnosis

Captain Jean-Luc Picard strode purposefully down the corridor. He was hungry, and his lunch date was late. The computer had informed him that his wayward wife was in Med Lab 2. He wasn't really surprised. It was just like her to forget all about time - and food - when she was wrapped up in her research. Rounding the corner, he nearly collided with Alyssa Ogawa.

Alyssa's eyes widened in surprise, then she glanced quickly over her shoulder. Toward Med Lab 2. "Captain... um, can I... help you?"

A prickle of unease skittered across the back of his neck. Alyssa always treated him with the respect and deference due the ship's captain, but he had never intimidated her. Her stammered greeting was out of character.

"Thank you, Alyssa, no." He inclined his head toward the doors she had obviously just exited. "I'm looking for Beverly."

Indecision flashed across her face. Now, he knew something was wrong. The young nurse was fiercely loyal to Beverly, and she was obviously worried about betraying a confidence. He spared her the ordeal, leaving her standing in the corridor as he entered the lab.

Beverly sat on the edge of the bio-bed, watching intently as Selar waved an odd looking instrument over her. "Alyssa, did you - " She broke off as she looked up and saw her husband in the doorway. "Jean-Luc, what are you doing here?"

Jean-Luc eyed her anxiously. "I was about to ask you the same thing. Are you all right?" He looked pointedly at the instrument in Selar's hand.

Beverly nodded to her assistant and the Vulcan left without a word. "Jean-Luc, I...," she hesitated, raking a hand through her auburn hair. Sighing, she started again. "I need to tell you something. Will you sit with me?"

He crossed the room with leaden feet, trying to quell his instinctive fear that this was not good news. Levering himself up on the biobed, he searched her face. She wasn't pale; she wasn't flushed; she looked fine. She certainly didn't look sick.

She picked up his hand, lacing their fingers together. "I'm waiting for the results from a couple of tests, but I know what they will tell me. I'm in the early stages of Khdryan's Disease."

Jean-Luc's heart sank until he realized he had no idea what she was talking about. "All right," he paused to clear his throat. "I've never heard of it."

"It's a neuro-muscular disease. A rather rare one."

"What do we do about it?"

Beverly smiled at his use of the word 'we'. Even after thirty years of friendship, marriage had brought them closer than they had ever imagined being. Which made this new development even harder. "Not too much, really. There are treatments that inhibit the disease somewhat, but there's not a lot of research being done on it."

His hand tightened around hers. Seeing her grimace, he forced himself to relax his grip. "What you're saying is there's no cure." She nodded. "What exactly does that mean?" He was afraid of the answer, even though he knew that 'no cure' didn't necessarily equal 'terminal'.

"It means I'll get tired more easily. It means large expenditures of energy will be harder to recoup. There will be some bad days."

She steeled herself to say what came next. Words that had yet to be said aloud. The moment they were spoken, this would all be real. There would be no going back, no ignoring symptoms as she had for weeks. Telling him meant she would have to start dealing with the situation. "Long term prognosis - a year, maybe a little more, depending on how I respond to treatments."

The color drained from Jean-Luc's face as he forced himself to understand. A year? A year until what? Until the disease would run its course and then she would be fine? Or a year until... _'No!'_ his mind screamed. _'This can't be happening! Not to us - not to her!'_ "There has to be something we can do," he insisted, pushing away the terrifying image in his mind.

Placing a gentle hand to his cheek, Beverly turned him to face her. "It won't be that bad. It won't be terribly debilitating until the last couple of months. I'll probably have to give up my position as Chief Medical Officer sooner rather than later, but then, not having to run around Sickbay will help me conserve energy. I might even..."

"Don't talk like that!" he cut in, pulling away from her to pace anxiously. "You said there was research."

"That's not a viable option," she sighed, regretting the distance he had put between them even though she knew it was only temporary. She rose slowly then busied herself putting away instruments. Her voice took on a matter-of-fact tone. "The disease is too rare to warrant major research support. They used to call them 'orphan' diseases, ones that just don't affect enough people to make research worthwhile."

"How can you be so calm?" Jean-Luc shouted, catching her arm. "You can't just accept it. You have to fight this. Don't just stand there giving me a dissertation on medical research. Why am I the only one here yelling?"

"Because if I start screaming, I won't stop!" she suddenly shouted back. "I'm the one who's losing everything! I'm the one who won't be here to grow old with you! I'm the one who won't be here to help Renee with her homework, to see her first recital, her first date! I'm the one who won't be here to see Renee do **anything**!" She lost her battle for control as tears streamed down her face.

Tenderly, Jean-Luc gathered her in his arms, holding her as they both cried. Life wasn't fair, they both knew that, but this was too much. Fear and stubborn pride had kept them apart for so long. How could Fate have meant for them to be together only to do this?

The storm raged within them for several minutes then slowly abated. Stroking her hair, Jean-Luc murmured, "I'm sorry I shouted. I'm sorry I reacted so badly. I'm sorry I - "

Beverly drew back enough to place a finger over his lips. "It doesn't matter." She looked around, running a hand through her hair. "I need to get out of here. I don't want to be a doctor today and certainly not a patient."

He wiped away the last of her tears. "I don't think Dr. Selar will have any trouble covering for you. Why don't you, Renee and I spend the afternoon together, just the three of us?"

Beverly's eyes widened. "My God, Jean-Luc, how are we going to tell her?"

He pulled her close again. "We don't have to tell anybody anything right now. We'll find a way to deal with it then deal with everyone else." He kissed her forehead. "Come on, let's take our daughter to lunch."

oxo

Renee had been delighted when not one, but both, of her parents had come to pick her up early. Her exuberance was just the right temporary diversion they had needed to let the worst of the shock subside.

Jean-Luc gazed lovingly at the two figures asleep on the couch. Beverly had barely outlasted Renee, and neither of them had finished the bedtime story.

He marveled at the way his life had changed in the last few years. Fear had wielded control over so much of his life and Beverly's. She had feared opening herself to him only to lose him the way she had lost Jack. He, on the other hand, had been afraid of pushing her too far, too fast. It had taken a life threatening experience to convince her that any time together was worth the risk. Illness had brought them together and would now tear them apart. The cruel irony was not lost on him.

Beverly could recount most of the details of their wedding day, but Jean-Luc remembered only her. He had truly believed he couldn't be any happier - right up to the day Beverly told him she was pregnant. That he remembered vividly.

Renee's arrival was the perfect addition to their lives. Any thoughts of 'continuing the Picard male line' evaporated the moment she appeared, and he discovered that the words 'it's a girl' were the sweetest words he could ever have hoped to hear. Every day with Beverly and Renee was filled with joy and wonder.

Now it was all just supposed to end?

He tucked Renee into bed and then did the same for his wife. Although Beverly slept peacefully in the protective circle of his arms, for Jean-Luc, sleep was impossible. He had waited thirty years for her; he wasn't going to let her go easily.

tbc


	2. Revelations

Part 2  
Revelations

For a few months, they were able to carry on as if nothing had happened. Most of the changes were subtle. He worried a bit more when she was on Away Team missions, but he kept that to himself. She didn't always tell him quite how tired she was at the end of the day. Every so often, he let her sleep through breakfast. She did her best not to disturb him when muscle cramps woke her in the middle of the night.

At first, Jean-Luc had been angry that she had kept her symptoms hidden from him for so long - then he turned the anger to himself for not noticing.

He tried to curb his emotions by reading everything there was on Khdryan's Disease. The one bright spot he could find was that the symptoms of Khdryan's were far less severe than most similar diseases. Although it manifested weakness in the extremities, it primarily affected the heart and lungs, ultimately making them too weak to function. The progression was slow, but the end was relatively quick and painless.

He also investigated every avenue of research he could think of, only to find that Beverly had already been there. She was furious to learn of his efforts, insisting that she could take care of it herself. He spent considerable time convincing her that he wasn't going to be an idle bystander in all of this. They were finally able to compromise by agreeing that she would handle the medical aspects while he would be responsible for the more domestic side.

Even with their agreement, he didn't have any better luck getting her to slow down than he ever had before.

They told only one other person about the situation and only because medical protocol demanded it. Mariah Duvall, an excellent ship's counselor, was quickly becoming a good friend, but she wasn't Deanna and for the first time, Beverly was glad that Will's command of the Saò Paulo had included a ship's counselor position for Deanna. She missed her friends terribly, but there was no way she could have gotten this far with Deanna as her counselor. Mariah's more neutral perspective was just what Beverly needed to deal with this.

Selar and Alyssa collaborated to keep the situation quiet so that the medical staff wouldn't find out and helped create a treatment plan that interfered the least with Beverly's schedule.

And the treatments were working. Some days, Beverly even forgot she was sick.

oxo

She had been working herself too hard. It was really a no-win situation. The disease took so much out of her, yet she stubbornly refused to rest, determined not to let it rule her life.

Now Beverly stood in front of the holodeck. She was tired, but she hadn't missed a dancing date with Data yet, and she wasn't going to do it now. With a small sigh, Beverly tapped the keypad, and the doors hissed open.

An hour later, she was glad she had pushed through her initial fatigue. Dancing was the second most relaxing, fulfilling, exhausting thing she did. She preferred Jean-Luc as a partner for the other one.

"You know, Data," she said wiping her face, "you're the worst and the best kind of dance partner."

"I do not understand, Doc - Beverly." For some reason, it was still difficult for the android to adjust his programming to treat her as a friend off duty and as a superior officer while on duty. The addition of his emotion chip seemed to add to his confusion.

Beverly smiled at the correction. "You're the worst because you pick up every step the first time. That kind of 'perfection' can be really annoying. On the other hand, you're the best because you have the infinite patience to work with me no matter how long it takes me to learn." She kissed his cheek, much to his surprise. "Come on, let's try that last combination again."

The music started on cue. Their movements were fluid and easy, the steps crisp and precise.

Then it happened.

One minute, Beverly was executing a series of perfect spins, the next she was crashing to the floor. Data hurried to kneel at her side. She sat up, tentatively massaging her left leg. Numbness was radiating from her toes up to mid-calf - and moving higher. "Damn it, not this," she muttered.

"Are you all right?" Data asked solicitously.

"Fine. Perfect. Just great."

Sarcasm was something Data had begun to understand, and he acknowledged Beverly's remarks as an exceptionally good example. However, recognizing it and knowing how to respond were very different things. He opted for a straightforward approach. "Are you well enough to continue?"

"I'm not sure. Could you give me a hand, please?" Data pulled her to her feet, but once upright, it was clear the leg would not support her. He ordered a bench so she could sit down.

"You are obviously injured. Shall I call Sickbay?"

"No!" She winced as it came out more sharply than she intended. Taking a slow breath, she continued. "No, I just need to get to my quarters, but I'd rather wait to get some of the feeling back so that I don't have to go hobbling through the ship."

After a moment's consideration, Data said, "Computer, two for site-to-site transport to Dr. Picard's quarters." Beverly smiled gratefully as he helped her up once again. "Initiate sequence, authorization Data Alpha Omega 2."

oxo

Jean-Luc was going over reports, and Renee was playing on the floor when the whine of a transporter beam startled them both. Jean-Luc was on his feet and around the desk before Beverly and Data finished materializing.

"What happened?" he demanded as Data assisted her to the couch.

"Beverly fell on the holodeck. Her leg is injured, but she did not wish to go to Sickbay."

"I'm not injured, it's just a little numb," she insisted.

"So numb that you can't even stand on it," Jean-Luc observed, far from placated by her clarification. "Damn it, Beverly, why won't you..."

Fire blazed in her eyes as she cut him off with a sharp look then nodded toward Renee. She fought to keep her voice even as she said, "Sweetheart, could you do me a favor? I left some things on the holodeck. Would you go with Data and get them for me, please?"

"Okay, Mama," the little girl replied, eager for the small adventure.

"Captain, I could easily retrieve the items myself," Data offered.

Jean-Luc sighed and turned to his first officer. "Please do us both a favor and take Renee with you. I need to... discuss something with Beverly, and it would be better if she weren't here."

Renee looked from her mother to her father and back again. "They're gonna get loud. Usually, I hafta go to my room, but I'd rather go to the holodeck."

"Actually, Data, if it wouldn't interfere with any other plans, could you watch her for awhile?" Beverly asked.

"It would be my pleasure."

"Would you like to have Data take you to dinner in Ten Forward?"

"Can I have anything I want?" Renee's eyes glowed at the prospect.

"Why don't you ask Guinan to help you pick something?" her father suggested.

"Come on, Uncle Data," she said, taking his hand. "I'm hungry!"

Jean-Luc watched the pair leave, adding his daughter's matter-of-fact attitude toward the impending argument to his list of worries. Turning back to Beverly, his furious tirade was instantly forgotten when he saw she was crying.

She hadn't cried since the day she told him about her condition.

He held her just as he had on that day. Something more than a minor accident on the holodeck had brought this on. As her sobs eased, he brushed a wisp of hair off her damp cheek.

"Tell me," he murmured.

"It's beginning to take things away from me. Logically, medically I knew it would happen. But why did it have to start with my dancing?"

The anguish in her voice tore at his heart. "I know how much you love it, but - "

"Do you know why I dance?" she interrupted. He shook his head, puzzled by the abrupt question. "Because, for the longest time, it was the only thing I had." She sat up so that she could look at him. "After the disaster on Arveda, there wasn't much time for anything but staying alive. I was either helping Nana or sleeping simply because I was exhausted. When the worst was over and things sort of leveled out, I was always alone because I was afraid to make friends." She smiled faintly and squeezed his hand. "I believe you and I covered that subject. Anyway, dancing was something I could do all by myself. I could make the music, create the steps, the movements. Dancing was the only thing that made me feel like I was alive."

She talked so rarely about her past, and Jean-Luc was stunned by the intensity of emotion behind her revelation. No matter what he thought of his own childhood, his had been easy compared to Beverly's.

He tried to picture her as a little girl. Did she look like Renee but without the smiles or the laughter? What must it have been like for such a young child to see so many people die, including her mother?

She had said dancing made her feel alive. He knew from his own experience that there was a vast difference between living and merely existing.

"You don't have to stop dancing altogether. You just need to cut back. Don't push yourself until you collapse."

She was off the couch in a flash, unable to sit still. "But that means the disease wins! It controls my life!" Although the numbness had receded, her leg was still weak, so she braced herself on the back of a chair.

Jean-Luc knew she was spoiling for a fight, but he wasn't willing to let her expend any precious energy in a pointless argument. Silently he moved toward her. She tensed at his approach, squaring her stance, trying not to fall over as she relaxed her grip on the chair. He merely reached past her to swivel the chair around. Startled by the unexpected move, Beverly offered no resistance as he pushed her gently into the chair.

Kneeling before her, he said quietly but firmly, "You are in control, but going on like nothing has happened means the disease will advance faster. That cheats you out of time. It cheats the rest of us, too. Beverly, is an extra few minutes of dancing worth losing days that you could be spending with Renee?"

"Aren't I losing time with you as well?" she asked quietly.

He brushed away her tears. "My wonderful Beverly... I have over thirty years of memories. Do I want more? God, yes; but Renee needs her mother. And you need her." Kissing her gently, he added, "Perhaps it's time you taught her to dance. And don't just tell her why you love it, tell her why you do it. Someday, she'll need to know that sort of thing."

The tears started again as she hugged him. "I'll do it, but only if you come with us. I want to make lots of memories for both of you."

Jean-Luc held her tightly for several minutes, trying desperately not to think about the time when he would have only memories of her. "You've had a busy day," he said at last, "and you need to rest. Renee gets up awfully early, you know."

With a purposely dramatic sigh, she let him help her into the other room.

Once she had bathed and changed, she announced that she was hungry, and in queenly fashion, allowed him to serve it to her in bed. Afterwards, Jean-Luc left her reading there and went looking for their daughter.

oxo

The incident on the holodeck made Beverly and Jean-Luc aware that they had some very good friends who deserved to know what was happening so, with Mariah's help, they broke the news to Data and Geordi.

It wasn't easy, but other conversations would be harder.

oxo

Thanks to a call from Admiral Nechayev, Jean-Luc had missed dinner, and judging from the dimness as he entered the cabin, the report he had had to write also caused him to miss seeing both Renee and Beverly before they had gone to bed.

Stopping by his daughter's room to kiss her good night, he was surprised to find Beverly in the chair next to the bed.

"What's going on?" he asked softly. "Is Renee sick?"

Beverly shook her head wearily as she rose to her feet and crossed to him. "I wish it were that simple."

He wrapped his arms around her automatically as she buried her face in his neck. "What happened?"

There was a long silence before she raised her head. "Have you eaten?"

"I had something while I was working on that report." Even in the dim light he could see the dark smudges forming under her eyes. "Why don't we get ready for bed, then you can tell me what happened."

Beverly didn't answer but turned toward the bedroom, pulling off her robe.

A few minutes later Jean-Luc slid under the covers, and she immediately moved into his arms, resting her head on his chest. "Comfortable?" he asked, stroking her hair. Beverly nodded in response. "Okay, talk."

"Well," she sighed, "the short version is I was late picking her up, so she was a bit cranky about that. Then we had a long discussion about picking up her toys. She didn't want to eat dinner, she wanted me to read to her. I was so tired, I didn't want to do anything. She whined, and I snapped at her. She cried, I cried." Beverly hesitated, knowing this would not go over well. "Then I told her I'm sick."

She felt his arms tighten around her slightly. "Don't you think that was something we should have done together?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry, but it didn't work out that way. It was what needed to be done at the time. I just told her that I was going to be tired a lot from now on and would need her help. I'm not sure exactly how much she understood, but I know I watched my baby grow up more in a few minutes than she should have to do for years."

"Our daughter is very resilient. She..."

"She shouldn't have to be!" Abruptly she rolled away from him. She sat up but didn't turn to look at him. "She's too young to have to go through this. I know what it's like to watch a parent die."

He watched her struggle for control, the sheets clenched tightly in her fists. After a long moment, Jean-Luc sat up and slid across the bed behind her. Slipping his arm around her waist, he drew her back against his chest and rested his chin on her shoulder. He remained silent as he waited for some of the tension to ease from her.

"It won't be the same," he began softly. "When your mother got sick, she didn't have time to make sure you understood everything or to create special memories. Your grandmother didn't have time to make you feel secure and loved. Felisa didn't do anything wrong, but it was all she could do to keep you and herself alive." He tenderly brushed a lock of hair off her face and kissed her temple. "I promise you, Renee won't go through that. She'll have me. She'll have Wesley and Marie. She'll have Deanna, Will and Luke. She'll have Data and Geordi and Alyssa and Mariah and lots of other people who love her and will help her deal with all of this."

She nodded, letting him believe that she was mollified by his assertions. In truth, they had merely served to make her aware of another concern. _'My darling Jean-Luc,'_ she thought to herself, _'who's going to take care of you?'_

"And don't worry about me," he said knowing quite well how her mind worked, "I'll have Renee and all those people, too."

"Only if you let them in." The ghost of a smile flashed across her face as she caught his smothered sigh. "You've opened up so much these last few years, Jean-Luc -"

"Because of you and Renee," he interrupted huskily.

"That's my point. Don't let what's happening to me stop that. Please let Will and Deanna and the others help you." She turned to face him. "Promise me." Her voice was even, but the pleading in her eyes told him how much this meant to her.

"I promise," he vowed solemnly.

"You've never broken a promise to me - please don't start with this one."

His kiss sealed the pledge he had already made then he coaxed her back to lay down once again in his arms. "Why don't you get some sleep?"

"Not yet. This is one of the memories I want to make for you. The two of us here, like this, just being together."

They shared the particulars of their separate days, unconsciously keeping their voices low as though unwilling to draw attention to the warm cocoon they had created in the darkened cabin.

He was in the middle of recounting his conversation with Nechayev - a deliberately dull recitation in hopes of getting her to sleep - when she suddenly rose up on an elbow to look at him.

"Jean-Luc, what do you think Renee will look like when she's grown up?"

"What?" He was confused by the abrupt change of subject... and concerned by the path her thoughts seemed to be taking.

"Tonight, when I was sitting by her bed, I was thinking about how much I was going to be missing. I can imagine most of the milestones, but I can't picture her. You know, the little things, like... will her hair stay this shade of red or get darker? Will she be tall like me or tiny like Nana? Will she have the grace of a dancer or the confidence of a starship captain? Will she..."

"Beverly, please," he broke in, "don't do this to yourself."

"It's alright." Her hand rubbed lightly, reassuringly over his heart. "I'm not upset, really I'm not. I'm just curious." Beverly lay back down with a sigh. "I just wish I could see her."

oxo

Two months later

Even with her knowledge of every available shortcut on the Enterprise, it still took Deanna Riker twice as long as necessary to reach her destination. She and Will had left the Enterprise two years ago, yet much of the crew remained unchanged. Deanna had been stopped several times and barely been able to break away with promises to catch up with everyone soon. Rounding the last corner, she was relieved to find the corridor empty. A door hissed open, and she saw Mariah Duvall step out of the Picards' quarters.

"...better sooner than later, Beverly," she was saying. Mariah looked up as Deanna drew closer. "And no time like the present."

"But, Mariah - " Beverly started only to be cut off.

"No 'buts'. She'd know anyway." Turning, she smiled. "Deanna, it's good to see you. And congratulations. I'm sorry I can't stay, but I have another appointment in a few minutes. You two have a good long talk."

Puzzled by Mariah's cryptic parting words, Deanna looked at Beverly. There was a sadness about her friend that she didn't have time to latch on to because it was quickly overridden by pleasure and joy.

"Deanna, it is good to see you! And why didn't you tell me you and Will were having another baby?" After a quick hug, Beverly pulled her into the room. "Can I get you something? When did you get here? Where are Will and Luke?"

Deanna laughed, hardly knowing where to start answering the questions fired at her. "It's good to see you, too, Beverly." She lowered herself gingerly onto the sofa. "First, let me put your doctor's curiosity to rest. I didn't say anything because we wanted it to be a surprise. I'm five and half months along, and everything is fine."

Both women silently thought back to the way they had been able to share their last pregnancies. Renee was two months younger than Luke Riker - who was named for his godfather. It had helped both of them immensely to have someone to commiserate with, a feeling their husbands had shared whole-heartedly.

With a faint sigh, Deanna returned to the list of questions before any more could be asked. "We arrived about ten minutes ago. Jean-Luc and Renee met us in the shuttle bay. They sent me here, and the four of them disappeared to who knows where." She smiled at the mental image of the two men trying to herd small children, who wouldn't follow orders, in the proper direction. "I don't know which surprised me more, that you weren't with them, or that you weren't in Sickbay." She felt as much as saw the shadow cross the doctor's face.

Something wasn't right.

Beverly rose and moved to the replicator but didn't order anything. She fidgeted as though uncertain of what to do with her hands. "I'm not in Sickbay because I'm on leave. I don't want to miss a minute of your visit. Jean-Luc and Will think being on the bridge is a vacation, but I want to spend time with you and the children."

The uncharacteristic nervousness had not gone unnoticed. Deanna put on her best counselor's face as she said, "Okay, now tell me the truth."

"Sometimes I really hate it when you go and get empathic on me," Beverly gibed. It was an old line, a running joke between friends. This time, it wasn't even worth a smile. Beverly sighed and braced herself. "The truth. Your visit was really just a convenient excuse. By the end of the week, I'll no longer be Chief Medical Officer on the Enterprise. In fact, once Headquarters receives the communiqué, I'll be officially retired from Starfleet."

"Why? What's happened?" Deanna shivered slightly as she again sensed sadness - and anger - and fear - from her friend. Mariah's odd choice of words came back to her. _'...another appointment...' 'She'd know anyway.'_ The counselor realized she had caught the end of a therapy session... and felt a sickening sense of what was to come.

"Because I'm dying."

Simple and unadorned, the statement hung heavily in the air.

Deanna's eyes filled with tears. "Beverly, no!"

Beverly swiftly returned to the couch and hugged her friend. "Please don't cry, Deanna." It wasn't very convincing since her own voice cracked.

The counselor pulled away in surprise. "My dearest friend has just told me she's dying, and I'm not supposed to cry?"

"No, you're supposed to yell. Insist there has to be something that can be done. Deny that it's true all together. That's how everyone else has reacted." Again, the attempt at humor fell short, but it did provide a little time for the reality of the situation to sink in. "Deanna, you're one of the few to know right now. Selar and Alyssa have known from the beginning. The senior staff knows. I'm hoping Jean-Luc is telling Will. At least I'm guessing that's why he sent you to see me alone." She laughed ruefully. "Silly, isn't it? Our two closest friends and neither of us could face both of you together." Her face clouded again. "It won't be easy to tell Worf either. I hate the idea of sending this kind of news in a letter or even over sub-space... especially after Jadzia."

"Will and I are stopping at DS9 for a couple of days after we leave here. Would you like us to tell him? I know you'd rather do it yourself, but we could at least do it in person."

"I'll talk to Jean-Luc and see what he wants to do."

"What about Wesley?"

"He showed up here the day after I told Jean-Luc. On some level he already knew, that's why he came. He's made a point of dropping in every few weeks since then." Her face twisted in a mock grimace. "Too bad I have to be terminal to see my son."

Deanna's gasped softly. "Beverly, don't say that."

"Sorry, Mariah's pretty used to my dark humor by now." She sighed. "I'll have to tell the rest of my staff, since I can't retire without a reason. It will be all over the ship in half an hour." The discomfort at the prospect was clear on her face. "That's what I don't want to deal with. I hate the idea of all those pitying looks following me around."

"It won't be pity, Beverly, they care about you. You're a part of their lives. Jean-Luc may be the captain of this ship, but you are its heart and soul. You always have been."

"That's rather pretentious, don't you think? I'm just a doctor, Deanna, not a miracle worker. Hundreds of people do what I do."

"No, they don't, at least not the way you do it." Beverly still looked skeptical so Deanna tried another tack. "Remember that nasty little bout of Codorian Plague you had a few years ago? Well, the whole time you were sick, I couldn't walk down a corridor without someone stopping me to ask how you were doing. And I wasn't the only one. Will, Data, Geordi, people were even stopping the Captain to ask him! These people don't care about a doctor, they care about you. Beverly, you have touched more lives in more ways than you will ever know."

"Thanks, Deanna," Beverly said wryly. "I thought I was only going to feel guilty about leaving Jean-Luc and Renee behind. Now I have to feel guilty about leaving the entire crew!"

"How do you feel about leaving Jean-Luc?"

"Damn it, Deanna, don't 'counsel' me!" she cried pushing away from the sofa to stare out the viewport. "I don't need another therapist, I need..." Tears filled her eyes again as she turned back. "I need a friend. I'm sorry, Deanna. I dump all this on you and expect you to act like it doesn't mean anything to you."

"It's my fault, too, Beverly. It was a defense. If I go into the professional mode, then I don't have to deal with it personally."

"Professional mode. That's a good term. I did it too in the beginning. I guess that's what scares me now. Once I'm not a doctor any more, I won't have that 'professional mode' to hide in. I've never been anything but a doctor, Deanna; it's who I am. I don't know what to do if I don't have that."

Deanna went to the replicator. After ordering hot chocolate for herself and lemon tea for Beverly, she brought the cups back to the table. Settling back onto the sofa, she motioned for Beverly to join her. "How about we both get a bit professional for a moment? All you've said is that you're... dying..."

"...and, professionally speaking, some details would make it more real, right?" She paused, looking into her friend's now red-rimmed dark eyes. She saw the caring and compassion she had come to expect, but there was fear and sorrow now as well. "I know this is a lot for you, Deanna, but I'm very glad you're here."

"Me, too," Deanna replied, squeezing her hand. "We were talking about details. Does this disease have a name?"

The explanation of Khdryan's Disease took only a few minutes. They had had this conversation before, about other patients, but this time it was much more personal.

"How far has it advanced?"

"Far enough that I had problems in surgery the other day. It was a long one, I got tired and started dropping things. Luckily, only Alyssa was there, but she was worried enough to ask if she should call Selar to finish for me. I said no... but she should have done it anyway." She wiped at her face, not even trying to stop the tears.

"Beverly, that was a small incident. You were realistic enough to know it would only get worse, and you did the right thing by retiring."

"No, it was mostly foolish pride. I didn't want to be in Sickbay one day and simply fall down."

"Is that a possibility?" Deanna asked quietly.

"No... not really. As I said, despite the minor weakness and loss of some fine motor control, it primarily concentrates on the heart and lungs." The words melted away the last of her 'professional detachment', and she whispered brokenly, "Oh God, Deanna, I don't want to die!"

Deanna had no response for that except to hug her friend and cry along with her.

oxo

The children were involved in whatever imaginary adventure they had created for themselves. The two illustrious starship captains looked on with unmistakable pride of possession - a term at which their wives would most certainly have balked. Two men who, for a great many years, believed their careers were all important had learned in a very short time that they were absolutely, totally wrong. And neither of them had ever regretted being corrected.

Will Riker turned to his former commanding officer, but the words he had been about to say died unspoken. There was an odd element to Jean-Luc's smile; a haunted look that Will had never seen before. "Is something wrong, Jean-Luc?" Use of the older man's first name had been a difficult transition, even after he himself had become a captain. They were genuine, close friends now, but Will would always consider Picard to be the 'superior' officer.

Picard continued to watch the children. He spoke softly, almost absently, "Sometimes these days, it's hard to find anything that's right." The last traces of the smile faded. "Will, Beverly is... sick. God, listen to me, I can hardly say it out loud."

Will fought the sinking feeling in his stomach. _'Beverly? Sick? Doctors don't get sick,'_ he thought irrationally.

Jean-Luc took a deep breath. When he spoke, he was controlled - clear, precise, clinical. "She has a neuro-muscular condition called Khdryan's Disease. There's about three months left on the original year's prognosis, but she has responded well to what little treatment is available. Dr. Selar thinks the newest expectation is an extra six to nine months." His voice dropped lower, the control gone. "She's dying, Will, and I can't do anything to stop it. I can't help her." He brushed roughly at the tear that rolled down his face. "I keep thinking about all the time we wasted, time we could've been together. We should have left Starfleet when we got married! We should have been in LaBarre, making babies and making wine. This never would have happened if..."

"You can't know that," Will interrupted firmly. "Things happen planetside, too. You and Beverly could have had that house full of kids, and you could have died in that fire along with Robert. Don't start second-guessing your decisions now. Make the most of the time you do have together."

"But I need Beverly. I can't raise a child alone," he murmured brokenly, looking up at the sound of Renee's laughter. "I don't know how."

"Do you really think Beverly did with Wesley? Nobody does. You and Renee will learn together. Besides, I'm counting on you to tell me what to do when my little girl arrives in a few months."

It was just the right combination of support and humor to help dispel some of the somber mood.

"You're a captain now, Will; you're supposed to know everything already."

"Oh, I can run a starship with my eyes closed," Riker said, puffing out his chest, but he deflated just as quickly as he looked at the children, adding softly, "but parenthood is something completely different."

oxo

Beverly and Deanna had left the dark topics behind, and the two proud mothers were exchanging toddler stories when the door opened. Their laughter faded as Jean-Luc entered with Will. Without a word, Beverly rose and crossed the room into Will's embrace.

"I'm sorry seems like such a stupid thing to say," Will murmured, choking back tears as he wrapped her in a bear hug.

"Not stupid," she reassured him softly, "only unnecessary. Another hug is the best thing you can do for me." And he was more than willing to oblige.

"Where are the children?" Deanna asked belatedly, having followed Beverly's lead by hugging her former captain.

"Knowing Renee, they're probably with Data." At her husband's confirming nod, Beverly continued. "I honestly don't know who learns the most from the other. She certainly keeps his emotion chip in overdrive. I just hope that dealing with two four-year-olds doesn't send him into overload!"

oxo

"Mama, guess what?"

"What, sweetheart?"

"Me and Luke is gettin' married."

The three males at the table stopped eating, but the three females went right on as though it were an everyday announcement.

"Renee! You wasn't 'spossed to tell!" her diminutive 'fiancé' hissed. "It's 'spossed to be a se'ket!"

Fire to match her hair blazed in Renee's eyes. "You can't tell me what to do!"

The others struggled to contain their laughter as Beverly sought to diffuse the brewing argument. "Well, now that it isn't a secret any more, what are your plans? When are you getting married?"

Renee sent a triumphant smile in Luke's direction before turning to her mother. "When we're big. After we get out of the 'cademy."

Beverly's small gasp went unnoticed by the children, but the others heard it clearly. Her anguished eyes carried her thoughts as though she had spoken them - _'I won't be here.'_

tbc


	3. Changes

Part 3  
Changes

They had been arguing back and forth for over an hour.

"Jean-Luc, we have to be realistic about this! You're wearing yourself out trying to run this ship and take care of me. And neither of us is doing Renee any good. We both have to find a way to let someone else help us." Beverly ran a trembling hand through her hair. It had been a long day, but then, all the days were long now, with very little to fill them. She missed even the quiet activity of Sickbay.

Mostly, she was tired of being tired, and her husband's hovering didn't help. Beverly hated being doted on. She was quite likely to scream if he asked her one more time if she needed anything. He was so busy trying to anticipate her needs, she no longer knew herself what she needed. He would only be hurt if she told him to just leave her alone - mostly because, she probably wouldn't say it very nicely.

He rubbed his smooth head, tired himself. The last few months had taken more out of both of them than they had known they had in them. He needed to find a way to help Beverly. They were both living on borrowed time.

An idea began to take shape, one that just a few years ago would never have occurred to him. "Why don't we go home?" he said slowly

"Home? What are you talking about?"

He took her hand and pulled her down to sit next to him. "Let's go to LaBarre. We can relax, sleep as late as we want - or as late as Renee will let us. We can take walks in real fresh air, not on the holodeck. We can buy real food in the village or use the replicator when we don't feel like cooking. We'll see only the people we want to see and only when we want to." Beverly opened her mouth to protest, but he held up a silencing hand. "Think about it. No Away Teams, no tedious mapping missions, no boring diplomatic functions, the perfect excuse to avoid the Admirals' Dinner - "

"Jean-Luc, stop." She traced a finger lightly down his face, finding tiny new lines that hadn't been there a month ago. "It's a lovely idea, but we need a solution, not a vacation."

"I'm not talking about a vacation. I'm talking about an indefinite leave of absence." Her eyes widened. He drew her into his arms, and she settled her head on his shoulder. He couldn't look in those beautiful blue eyes and say what he had to say. "Beverly, you've already gone beyond the original prognosis, and every extra day is precious. I don't want to waste what time we have left together. We need - I need - to cut out all extraneous distractions."

"You'd..." her voice cracked. She cleared her throat and tried again. "You'd give up the Enterprise?" Now it was she who couldn't look at him. Tears welled at the enormity of the sacrifice he was willing to make. For her.

"I'd have given it up that first day, my love, if it would have prevented all this. Nothing - not the Enterprise or Starfleet or my career - are important. The only things that matter are you and Renee."

She knew he was crying now, too. Although they had never avoided the issue, it was always the disease they talked about, never the ultimate outcome. They were both reluctant to put into words the end of a relationship that had sustained them both for so many years, even before their marriage.

Leaving the Enterprise meant time was truly growing short. It was a monumental step that comforted and frightened her at the same time.

She drew solace from the knowledge that her husband was a man of action. His decision meant he had not only accepted the inevitable, he was looking beyond it to the future with Renee. She knew he would survive this.

But it frightened her to realize her own last defense was gone. All those 'extraneous distractions' had provided a sort of barrier from the truth, and she had been able to keep a tiny flicker of hope alive.

They sat for a long time, wrapped in each others' arms and their own thoughts.

"Jean-Luc?" her voice was low.

"Yes, love?"

"I want to go to Caldos."

He gave her shoulders a squeeze. "I think we can arrange that. A few days there would break up the trip back to Earth and - "

"No," she said pulling away from him to sit up, "I want to stay on Caldos. Whatever time I have left, I want to spend it there." This time, she stopped his interruption. "I don't want to be another death you associate with LaBarre. When it's all over, take me back there. Bury me on the hill with Robert and Rene and all the other Picards. But let the memories of us there together be happy ones. Please, Jean-Luc, don't let sorrow be the only thing waiting for you when you finally come home."

He had never been able to deny her anything - and this was no exception.

oxo

Starfleet complained - rather loudly - at his decision. They had already lost one of their finest doctors, now the captain of their flagship.

Jean-Luc remained unmoved by their distress as, for the first time since he entered the Academy all those years ago, he didn't really care what Starfleet wanted from him.

They relented only when he attempted to change his sabbatical into a resignation, finally understanding that he was going whether they liked it or not.

They discovered that leaving the Enterprise was relatively simple. Leaving behind the men and women who were much more than crewmates - that was the difficult part. It was a small comfort to know they were leaving their friends in good hands when the Rikers returned as captain and ship's counselor.

oxo

Caldos proved to be the very refuge they needed. Away from the pressures of the Enterprise and Starfleet they were both able to relax. The colonists, at first, welcomed the Picards as remnants of Felisa Howard's family, but soon accepted them on their own merits.

They each found a way to be part of the community rather than brood on the inevitability of the situation. Beverly got to practice a little medicine when people came to reminisce about her grandmother and managed to turn the conversation to other things. Jean-Luc became an unofficial advisor and confidante to Governor Maturin.

The transition was more difficult for Renee. She made few friends, none very close, and Beverly hated seeing her daughter suffering the same lonely childhood that she had. The Howard temper began to show itself more frequently in this newest generation, but her parents were comforted somewhat by reports that Renee mediated as many arguments as she started.

The small family settled in to their new routine and tried not to think about the reason that had brought them here.

tbc


	4. Favors

Part 4  
Favors

The party was Beverly's idea. Jean-Luc wanted to celebrate their anniversary quietly, just the two of them, but she insisted that a party was definitely in order. He gave in, as he had known he would from the moment she proposed the idea, because he knew it would be her last chance to see their friends.

The disease had begun to take its toll more aggressively. Some days, she could sit on the grass playing games with Renee. Other times, the walk to the breakfast table was exhausting. And now, ever more frequently, came the days when getting out of bed was too much. Planning for the party, however, seemed to infuse Beverly with new energy.

They just never quite expected _everyone_ to come.

People had started arriving the day before. Wesley and Marie were staying at the house, which delighted Renee. Will, Deanna, their two children, Geordi, Data and Worf found a house nearby that would hold all of them. Other friends filled most of the available rooms in the village.

One surprise had been the arrival of Admiral Alynna Nechayev.

Jean-Luc hadn't even been aware that invitation had been extended, and he wondered why Beverly had done it. Given the fact that their prior relationship could only be described as coolly formal and polite, he couldn't imagine what his wife and the admiral found to talk about during a very long, very private conversation.

oxo

Beverly and Jean-Luc were spending the morning going over some last minute party details when an all too familiar flash of light appeared.

The irritation that raced through Jean-Luc was an almost conditioned response to the being now standing before him. "Q! What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded as he leapt to his feet. He didn't need this now. He didn't have time for whatever games Q wanted to play.

"I could ask the same of you, mon capitane. Whatever possessed you to bury yourself in this galactic backwater? And without telling me?"

Q's feigned expression of hurt only infuriated Picard more.

"You were never welcome on the Enterprise, Q. You're certainly not welcome here!"

Renee hurried to her mother's side, far more upset by her father's anger than the other man's sudden appearance. "Why is Papa yelling at that man?"

"Mostly out of habit, sweetie," Beverly replied soothingly as her daughter slipped behind her. Rubbing Renee's shoulder, she smiled faintly as Jean-Luc and Q performed their familiar routine of taunt and retort.

Q's delight in tormenting his favorite human brought to mind other encounters with the Continuum's resident bad boy. Of course, it was always easier to remember them than to live through them.

One of those memories brought Beverly up short. Amanda Rogers had told her that Q had allowed her to 'see' her parents, her real parents, who had died when she was a baby.

Could he...?

At the first opening, she stepped forward. "Hello, Q," she said, smiling brightly at their unexpected guest. "It's been a long time, to us at least." Both men were astonished by the calm greeting. Her next words were a surprise, even to herself. "Renee, are you ready to go to the market with Papa? I'd like to talk to Q."

"Why?" Q asked suspiciously, an instant before Jean-Luc could get it out himself.

"Shouldn't an omnipotent being already know the answer to that?" She raised a hand to stop his retort. "Sorry, I guess I have a few habits of my own. Anyway, it's nothing sinister." She paused a moment. This was an opportunity she hadn't expected, but now it seemed like such an impulsive idea. Could she go through with it? She answered herself with a firm 'yes'. "I... I want to ask a favor."

Picard's mouth dropped open, and he wondered how any of this could really be happening. "Beverly, have you lost your mind? How can you even think of asking Q for a favor?"

Beverly sidestepped the question as her resolve strengthened. "I promise, Jean-Luc, everything will be fine. Q will probably be gone by the time you get back." She handed him the shopping list and prodded him gently toward the door. "Please. If you don't go now, we'll never be ready in time." Caressing his cheek lightly, she made him focus on her. "Go... I'll be all right."

Jean-Luc started down the path, but stopped to look over his shoulder. Suddenly, Beverly called to Renee. The little girl ran back and her mother leaned down to whisper in her ear, "Make Papa smile."

Renee giggled her agreement, and Beverly watched them leave, a wistful smile shadowing her face. She turned to find Q standing right behind her, hand braced on the doorframe.

"_'Make Papa smile'_," Q mocked. "How touching. And yet the good doctor gets rid of husband and child just to be alone with me? This might prove very interesting."

To his amazement, Beverly lifted a hand to run her finger lightly under his jaw. "You can be quite charming, Q..." she murmured sweetly before slipping under his arm and heading back to the couch, "...when you aren't being childish. Please, won't you sit down?"

Q was most intrigued. He had ignored her comment about omnipotent beings because she could never possibly understand that knowing everything was not the same as paying attention to it. Still, this was not the attitude he was used to getting from Red. He took the offered seat, watching her speculatively.

"You didn't get an answer to your original question." She looked him straight in the eye as she finished, "We're here because I'm dying."

Surprising Q wasn't easy, and he was chagrined to realize a human had just done it. Perhaps it was time to start paying more attention to some things. "Ah," he smirked, "so the favor would be...?"

"Nothing like what you're thinking. That's one favor I could never repay, and I think you know me well enough to understand that I also could never be indebted to you. A legitimate cure is unlikely and an extension wouldn't really change things, only delay them. I'm mortal - perilously close to proving it, in fact - and I've accepted it." Her small sigh suggested that 'resigned to it' might be a more accurate description. "No, what I want is very simple... and is something only you can do for me."

"But you'll still owe me."

"Oh, I intend to pay my debt up front. Hard as it may be to believe, I have some advice for you." She smiled at the look of total disdain on his face then continued, "Do yourself a favor, Q. Leave Jean-Luc alone for a while after I'm gone. At least a year. The time won't mean anything to you, but it will to him. Besides, he won't be much fun."

"The second thing is really for your own good. Don't ever try anything with Renee. He won't stand for it. He's always been content just to have you leave the ship, because what you do to his crew is one thing... what you do to his child is something entirely different. Hurt Renee in any way, and he'll follow you all the way back to the Continuum. You have enough trouble with them, you don't need an angry Jean-Luc Picard after you, too."

The entity opened his mouth to scoff at the idea then quickly closed it. If anyone could find a way to reach the Continuum, it would be Picard, and they would listen to him. The Continuum was always looking for any leverage to make him behave. Perhaps it was time earn a few points in his favor. A record of having been nice to one of his humans, especially this one, might help temper their ire. Sighing dramatically, he asked, "What is your wish, Madame Picard?" and liked the sneering tone he put on the 'Madame'.

"I want to see Renee, what she'll look like when she's grown."

"Are you so sure she'll grow up?"

Beverly paled at the possibility no parent ever considers.

The stricken look on her face brought Q up short. The cruelty hadn't been deliberate - it was just reflex for him to suggest the exact opposite to whatever might be proposed, and he had forgotten how attached humans were to their offspring. If Q ever regretted anything, it was making that remark.

_'It isn't that much of a favor she's asking, and she was so pleased with her 'advice'. It would be easy to...'_

Her words interrupted his rationalizations.

"No," she said slowly, "I can't be sure, but you've shown Jean-Luc one potential future. All I'm asking for is a tiny piece of another plausible alternative."

Q pretended to consider the request before making a show of agreeing. "You want to see her all grown up? All right, did you have a particular day in mind? A birthday? A wedding? Something else?"

"No, nothing special. I just want to see her."

"Close your eyes and focus to the best of your limited human abilities. Concentrate on..."

"Renee," Beverly whispered as she closed her eyes.

After what seemed like forever, but was really mere seconds, Q said, "Look."

It was the same kind of ghostly apparition that Amanda had described, but Beverly could see everything clearly.

Renee - tall, slender, with vibrant auburn hair framing a face of porcelain skin, a face lit by sparkling blue eyes. She looked like Beverly, but her stance was very much Jean-Luc's. It was the image of a woman, laughing, reaching out a hand to an unknown someone.

The image faded all too soon, and Beverly choked back tears as she turned to face Q. "I believe my original payment was insufficient," she said softly. Surprising both of them, she leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

Q would have blushed if he had known how.

oxo

Jean-Luc was glad to find Q gone when he returned from the market, but he was once again in the dark since Beverly would not tell him what happened with Q. She only said that the conversation was polite and the parting friendly. However, he noticed her watching Renee, a wistful smile shadowing her face.

Wesley had noted the subtle change in his mother as well. He brought a cup of tea to where she sat in the front porch swing, resting on orders from her husband.

"I won't ask about the favor you asked Q for because I know you won't tell me," he teased as he draped an arm around her shoulders, "but I'm guessing it involved Renee. And it made you happy." Searching her face he amended, "No, not 'happy', more like contented. Good, you deserve that." He shook his head. "I certainly never expected to be glad about anything that involved Q!"

She looked up at her oldest child, finding new marks of maturity. He was so much like Jack, and once again, she was sorry his father hadn't lived to see what a fine young man their son had become. "Wesley, I know you're all grown up with a life of your own, but I hope you'll be able to make time for Renee. You've been through this; you know the pain and anger and loss she'll be feeling. Please help her."

"Mom, you didn't have to ask, but I'm glad you did. It gives me the chance to tell you how much I love you. You were great with me when Dad died. You let me know me it was okay to miss him and to cry, but you showed me that we didn't have to 'die' with him." He squeezed her shoulders gently. "The best legacy he left was a strong family who loved and never forgot him. I promise I'll do my best to do the same thing for Renee."

Beverly reached out to brush the hair off his forehead, and not surprisingly, he still didn't like it. This time, though, he didn't pull away. He remembered his gawky teenage years when his appearance was all-important to him, and his mother would ruffle his hair in an attempt to get him not to take things so seriously.

Wesley sighed, hoping he could teach Renee the same things.

oxo

Several hours later

In a brief moment alone, she leaned her head back and closed her eyes, listening to the sounds around her. Voices joined in conversation and laughter... ice in glasses... feet on stone and carpet... music lilting, drifting, eddying through it all. Happy sounds.

She felt a shadow fall across her, and a voice rumbled, "Doctor, are you all right?"

"Who?"

"_Beverly_, are you all right?"

Opening her eyes, she peered up at the towering Klingon with a smile. "I'm fine, Worf, but would you do me a favor?"

"Of course," he replied instantly.

"Help me out of this damn chair. I could use some fresh air, and if I don't move around, I'll petrify." He offered his hand and drew her gently to her feet. A bit unsteady after sitting so long, she was grateful for Worf's supporting arm. "Let's go out the back door. Jean-Luc is on the front porch with Governor Maturin, and he'll just fuss."

Their progress was slow due to a bit of stiffness on Beverly's part and to several brief chats with guests along their path.

When Jean-Luc entered a few minutes later, he instantly noticed the empty chair. Even while reminding himself that if anything had happened someone would have told him, he anxiously scanned the room, and jumped when a hand landed on his shoulder.

"Relax, Jean-Luc," Will said, keeping his voice low. "She's in the back garden with Worf. She's fine; everybody's keeping an eye on her."

Picard swallowed hard. Knowing where she was and with whom almost helped. He stared straight ahead, but his vision was inward, conjuring up a future he didn't want to see. "That's the way it will be. One day, I'll turn around... and she won't be there. She's always been there. How can I live in a world where she no longer exists?"

Will steered his friend to a quiet corner. "You'll do it because Renee will need you. To begin with, that will be enough." He paused, searching for a sign that his words were getting through. When the older man finally looked at him, he continued, "I don't claim to understand how you feel, because frankly, I do my damnedest not to imagine myself in your position, but..."

Jean-Luc rubbed his neck tiredly. "Will, I'm sorry; you shouldn't have to listen to me."

"Why do you think we're all here? We're here for Beverly, for each other and above all for you. Right now, you focus on Beverly, later, Renee. And you let us help you." Will smiled slightly, trying to lighten the mood. "The first thing I'm going to help you do is get back in a party mood. So, do you want to talk warp engines with Geordi, command strategy with the Admiral or cat poetry with Data?'

Recalling Beverly's plea that he not close himself off from the other people who cared for him, Jean-Luc resolved to accept Will's support. Pretending to consider the offerings, he said with a smile of his own, "Perhaps Data has written some warp engine poetry."

They rejoined the festivities with Jean-Luc keeping a watchful eye on the back door.

oxo

Stars filled the sky as Beverly and Worf moved slowly through the garden.

With her arm linked through his, he could feel her leaning on him, and it infuriated him to see her ill. What had started out as deference to a senior officer had soon turned into grudging respect for a human female who could actually take care of herself. That in turn had become genuine friendship. Worf loathed the very idea of losing someone else he cared about... someone he loved. Especially after Jadzia.

He had not been on the station when Jadzia was injured and had barely gotten there in time to see her before she died. Was it easier when you could prepare for it? The warrior in him insisted that death should be quick... but that was in battle. This was a battle he wasn't equipped to deal with. Disease, with its insidious attack, seemed to be such a dishonorable foe.

He had watched the captain and the doctor wage their battle with quiet dignity. Bravely, unflinchingly.

"Worf?" Her soft voice broke into his thoughts. "I need another favor."

"Do you wish to sit down again?" he asked worriedly.

"God, no. Moving feels much better. Worf, I need you to take care of something for me." She stopped, turning to face him. "Take care of Jean-Luc. He'll go on for Renee's sake, but that's not enough. I know because Wesley wasn't enough for me when Jack died. He needs someone who will keep him interested in living. Send letters, call him. Tell him about problems on the station, even if you've already solved them. Give him something to think about besides what he's lost."

"As you did for me," Worf murmured as realization dawned. That was exactly what she had done, and he hadn't recognized it before. He vaguely recalled thinking that the tone of her letters had changed after Jadzia's death. The sorrow and sympathy were there to help ease his pain, but there was always something else. Something that made him forget... no, not forget, just _focus_ elsewhere if only for a few minutes.

"You're the one who understands, Worf. And he'll listen to you, he'll let you help him."

"It will be my honor, Beverly."

"Thank you, Worf." She reached up to kiss his cheek, then sighed. "I think we'd better go back inside before Jean-Luc comes looking for me."

oxo

The guests had all gone. Common sense told her she should have been in bed long before that, but she was out in the garden again, reluctant to let the evening end. She wanted to keep the magic for as long as possible.

Soft light spilled out as Jean-Luc opened the back door and came to join her. He bowed low and kissed her hand. "May I have this dance, my lady?"

Beverly smiled and moved into his arms, not bothering to mention the lack of music. She draped her arms around his shoulders, resting her cheek next to his. Jean-Luc hummed a vague tune as they glided around the terrace.

"How do you feel?"

"Alive, very much alive." She pressed closer to him, whispering, "Make love with me, Jean-Luc." Beverly saw the concern in his eyes when he drew back but silenced any protest with a soft kiss. "Please, make love with me. I need you."

Without another word, she led him into the house and up the stairs. Their lovemaking was slow and tender, every touch, every kiss like a new sensation.

oxo

The next day, no one was surprised that Beverly slept late. When she did wake, she stayed in bed. She received visitors, enjoying long talks with old friends... though she did fall asleep during a couple of the conversations. She woke up once to find Deanna asleep on the other side of the bed, four-month-old Kestra between them. Beverly watched the baby girl wave her arms and smile at nothing in particular. _'Will and Deanna certainly make beautiful babies,'_ she thought with a smile of her own as she reached out a finger to have it wrapped in a tiny fist.

A timeless gesture, it drew the pragmatist in Beverly to the fore. Life would go on, people being born, living, dying.

It was the way things were supposed to be.

tbc


	5. Farewell

Part 5  
Farewell

Most of the guests had left Caldos the day after the party, but her closest friends had seen enough of a change in Beverly to extend their stay. The colonists understood the significance of their continued presence. Once again they would be losing a Howard woman who had made an impact on their lives.

oxo

Three days later

Beverly had grown weaker every day in a sudden downhill slide. Now, it was simply a matter of time.

Jean-Luc and Wesley appointed themselves as timekeepers, standing guard to make sure everyone got to spend time with Beverly but didn't tire her too much.

oxo

It was a bittersweet sort of pilgrimage, and in almost every instance, it was Beverly who gave comfort.

Drying Data's tears, she cautioned him not to let himself rust and then had to explain about the Tin Woodsman who had wanted a heart from the Wizard of Oz. "Even when you kept insisting you didn't have any emotions, you always had a heart, Data," she told him through her own tears...

...She accepted a Worf's hesitant kiss, fully aware of what it meant for the Klingon to give into such a human gesture...

...Will used humor to cover his sorrow, but she heard the underlying affection as well...

...Geordi called her 'Doc' as they talked poker...

...Deanna told her the latest mischief Renee and Luke had gotten into...

...Marie talked of Robert and her Rene...

...Alyssa listened as Beverly reminisced about the staff she had left behind...

oxo

Picard paced a short, tight path in front of the fireplace. Three steps, turn; three steps, turn.

"She was so much better, before the party. I could see it, but now... Damn it! I knew we shouldn't have had that party!"

"The party is what kept her going this long. It was a goal, and now she's reached it."

Mariah had been expecting this session ever since the party and the change in Beverly's condition afterwards. From her place on the sofa, she watched his precise movements, trying to determine whether he was searching for words or simply struggling to keep himself from falling completely to pieces.

"Say it," she prompted quietly.

"You make it sound like she's giving up."

"Beverly isn't giving up," Mariah countered quietly, knowing this would be the most difficult aspect for him to accept. Her voice softened even further as she added what he had to hear, "She's letting go."

"No!" The word seemed to drain him, and he sank into a chair.

Mariah had seen denial in him before, but what she saw now was sheer terror. So many times she had been amazed by these two people, even before the diagnosis. They drew such strength from each other, sharing a connection that did not require physical contact. She had counseled others through similar situations, but none with the kind of history Beverly and Jean-Luc had shared. Theirs was one of the few marriages she had ever seen that was built as much on friendship as it was on love.

"Yes. These people came to visit a sick friend, but they stayed to say goodbye. They need to say it, and she needs to hear it... because she's ready to hear it."

Rage at his own helplessness turned into anger at Beverly. "If she's so eager to go, then why doesn't she do it?" he snapped. "Why doesn't she just go ahead and die?"

"She's not eager, she simply knows that it is time. She has said her goodbyes to everyone else, and now she is waiting to make sure that you are ready to let go. She needs to hear it from you."

He buried his face in his hands. "I can't do it! I don't want her to die!"

"That's not something you or she can change. She will die. How she dies... Captain, Beverly is not in any physical pain, but she can see your suffering." Mariah paused, waiting until he looked up at her once again. "She needs to know that you will be able to go on. It won't be easy, but when the time is right, the words will be there, and your love will give you the strength to say them."

oxo

Light streamed in the window, and although Beverly could have seen the sky from where she lay, it was too much effort to turn her head. Jean-Luc sat beside her, holding her hand and stroking her hair. He spoke softly, recounting their life together... how he had fallen in love with her the moment they met... his joy when she finally said that she loved him... times they had laughed, times they had cried... moments with Renee and with their friends... good, bad... and just moments.

Selar and Alyssa stood out of Beverly's line of sight. Everything that could be done had been done, and so they waited.

Her lashes fluttered, then suddenly, her sapphire eyes blazed with their old intensity. "Don't be alone, my love. Let the others in, let them help you." Beverly squeezed his hand and whispered, "I love you, Jean-Luc. Always remember that. Make sure Renee remembers. She's so young... please help her remember me."

"If I teach her nothing else, Renee will remember her mother and know she was loved," he vowed. Beverly's eyes drifted closed, but her grip on his hand did not loosen. Leaning over, he kissed her cheek and said the words he had thought he would never be able to utter, "It's all right, Beverly, you can let go now. You've done all you could do to help us through this. Renee and I need a guardian angel. Please watch over us." His voice broke, and he fought to steady it. "I will always love you, Beverly."

There was no great moment of passage. One soft breath, and Beverly was gone.

Jean-Luc looked at her, relaxed and at peace. He saw the tiny lines earned through laughter and worry and tears. He saw the few faint strands of gray among the fiery auburn. Above all he saw the vibrant young woman he had fallen in love with so many years ago. It was the image he would carry in his heart forever. He kissed her hand before gently laying it back on the bed.

Selar's tricorder hummed softly as she made the official note of the time of death. Solemnly, she turned to Jean-Luc, placing a hand on his arm. "I grieve with thee."

He nodded absently, scarcely hearing her.

Tears brimmed in Alyssa's eyes, but she did not let them fall. For the first time in her career, she broke protocol and hugged her former captain. "Sir, I..." she began but couldn't finish.

He swallowed hard, trying to steady himself in a world that was now so out of balance. "Thank you, Alyssa. You've both been a tremendous help and..." His voice faded as he heard the formal, stilted words. Falling back on his practiced reserve had been an automatic gesture - and the very thing he had, only moments ago, promised Beverly he would not do.

Only moments ago...

Reality crashed through the numbness that enveloped him and struck at his heart like a physical blow.

_'Oh, God, she's really gone!'_

Never in his life had he felt so alone. It didn't matter that there were nearly a dozen other people in the house because he was alone. Beverly had literally been his other half, and he knew he would never again feel completely whole.

Suddenly, Marie was there, and he saw the echoing sentiment in her eyes. She understood what he dared not put into words for fear of shattering completely.

Jean-Luc sucked in great gulps of air trying to regain his composure. "I can't... do this... Renee..."

"She's with Wesley," Marie said gripping his hands tightly, "and you can do this. You're allowed to fall apart. Let Renee see you cry. Let her know it's all right to cry and to miss Beverly. Let her know that even though her mother is gone, her father is still here for her."

oxo

Deanna was instantly aware of the change. She felt Beverly slip away, gently, easily, like mist. One moment her friend was there, the next, she had vanished. The emptiness left behind was almost too much. A sob welled up in her throat, and Will turned sharply at the sound. One look at his wife's face was all he needed. The others watched him gather her tightly in his arms, resting his cheek on the top of her head, his tears falling unchecked.

Data watched the people around him, finally understanding the anguish they felt over losing a beloved friend. Geordi had tried to explain it to him, but the reality was much more than he had imagined it would be. It was the first time he truly regretted installing his emotion chip. This hurt too much. For the briefest split second, he considered turning the chip off, but immediately knew he could not disrespect his friend's memory that way.

Sitting outside in the garden, Wesley felt it, too. When he began his studies of various planes of existence, he thought he could give up his connection to this time frame. The Traveler had shown him how wrong he was. So many ties anchored him here. They gave him a focal point to work from and a beacon to guide his return.

He felt the strongest tie dissolve with his mother's passing but others gained strength in its place - the little sister he adored... a stepfather who was a great deal more... old friends who had helped him find his way through so many things. He dimly remembered a saying his great-grandmother had used, something about roots and wings.

He didn't even realize he was crying until two small arms wrapped around his neck. "I miss Mama, too," Renee said softly, hiding her face in his shoulder.

oxo

The memorial service on Caldos was simple, and plans had already made for the burial in France. Marie and Wesley helped Jean-Luc close up the house before starting the long journey home.

Will, Deanna, Data, Worf, Geordi, Alyssa, Selar and Mariah - the Starfleet officers who had become a family - also made the trip to Earth.

Many an admiral and ambassador had been interred with more ceremony, but few people had ever been buried with more respect and love than Beverly Howard Crusher Picard.

tbc


	6. After Life

Part 6  
After Life

Jean-Luc ran a searching eye over the room one last time before snapping the case shut. Slinging the case over his shoulder, he walked out. Two doors down and across the hall, he stopped in another doorway.

Renee meticulously placed the last of her belongings - the blue plush rabbit that was the last gift from her mother - in the case on her bed and closed it. Jean-Luc's eyes squeezed shut for a moment. _'She's more like Beverly every day. She even sounds like her,'_ he thought to himself as the little girl softly sang an old lullaby... the lullaby she hadn't wanted to hear since her mother died.

It was a good sign.

"Renee? Sweetheart, it's time to go."

She dragged the case off the bed, flashing a smile in her father's direction. While not quite the exuberant smile it used to be, it was getting better as well. The case was awkward, but she was six now and didn't like to ask for help, having inherited a fair portion of stubbornness from both her parents. He took the case and shooed her down the stairs. The house was quiet as though the building itself knew it would be closed up, unused, for a long time.

"Can we walk to the station, Papa?" Renee asked as she slipped her hand into his.

"I think that's an excellent idea." He understood the need to prolong their departure. LaBarre was their healing place. Pain and sadness had brought them here, but father and daughter had slowly learned to live again.

Beverly had been right - all the memories were happy ones. When he pictured her here, she was smiling.

The year had not been an easy one. Marie had been a tremendous help, her own tragedy giving them a new, though sadder, common ground. She had tried to prepare him, but there were some things that could only be lived through.

The 'firsts' were the worst... all the events spent for the first time without Beverly. Her birthday, his birthday, their anniversary, and all the little days that had meant something to them but now only to him.

One of the hardest had been Renee's birthday, barely a month after Beverly's death. Will and the others had returned to their various duties, but Deanna and Luke had stayed to be there for the small party.

He would never forget her, standing so solemnly before the cake, about to blow out the candles.

_"I wish..."_

_"Don't say it out loud," Luke interjected. "It won't come true."_

_"It doesn't matter. It can't happen anyway. I wish Mama was here."_

The candles had gone out in a single breath, and Jean-Luc had held her while she cried.

She never even had a piece of her own cake.

The feeling of Renee resting her cheek against his arm pulled him back to the present. He looked down, eyeing the not-quite-straight part, then down the not-quite-flat plaits of auburn hair. Although he still wondered if he would ever be able to get it exactly right, it was another thing that had improved with a year's time and practice. It saddened him a little to realize how well they seemed to be getting along without Beverly.

Now, they were about to start their new life. The decision to return to Starfleet had been a natural one, pushed along by Admiral Nechayev's pestering of him for the last two months. He had always suspected that he had been the topic of conversation between the admiral and Beverly during their mysterious chat, a suspicion confirmed since many of the tactics the admiral used 'to get him back on track', as she put it, sounded exactly Beverly.

He had asked her to be his guardian angel but hadn't realized until recently that she had gotten an early start during her talk with the admiral.

They had offered him his choice of a starship or an ambassador's post. His only consideration being his daughter, he had chosen the latter for its relative safety. It also provided a better opportunity for a stable family life.

Besides, how could he be a captain again without his CMO?

Leaving, however, was proving to be more difficult than he had imagined. All his old memories had Beverly at the center. Now, they were going places where she would only be a photograph.

As they neared the shuttle station, Renee let go of his hand and started to run, braids flying behind her. "Uncle Will!" she cried.

Picard's steps slowed as Renee's picked up speed. He had scarcely seen a Starfleet uniform since leaving the Enterprise and seeing Will in one now touched something he couldn't quite identify.

_'They've changed the style again,'_ he noted. Life had indeed gone on outside of their small haven.

The bearded man scooped up Renee as much to keep from being bowled over as for the hug he was currently receiving.

"Will, this is a surprise." The men shook hands. "We're on our way to Starfleet Headquarters to arrange transport to Seivad 3. What brings you here?"

"You used to call it Captain's prerogative, Ambassador," Will said as formally as he could while holding a fidgety little girl. "I put in a standing request with Admiral Nechayev for escort duty whenever you went back to work. We're here to take you to your new assignment."

It was exactly the sort of gesture he should have expected Will to make, and one that he would not, in the past, have allowed himself to accept. The only reason he was willing to do so now was because of Beverly. He had let people in, and he would be forever grateful to her for that promise.

"Will, I..."

"No arguments," Will interrupted. "Quarters have been assigned, and your things have already been transferred."

Jean-Luc chuckled softly. "I was going to say that I can't think of anything we would like more than to be back on the Enterprise." Now he recognized what he had felt a moment ago. It was the tiny adrenaline rush that came with the start of every new mission. Breathing deeply, he felt a lightness he hadn't known for a very long time.

"Is Luke on the ship, too?" Renee's impatient voice cut into his thoughts. "And Aunt Deanna?"

Will tickled her stomach. "They certainly are. Luke can't wait to show you around." He tickled her again before setting her on her feet.

She tossed her head. "I know where everything is on the Enterprise. She was ours first."

"Renee has a lot of you in her, but that was all Beverly," Will noted, trying to keep a straight face.

"I know," Jean-Luc replied, "and I love every bit of it."

Will leaned in conspiratorially. "Let's go turn her loose on Luke. He could use someone who can really keep up with him." He paused to watch Renee struggle with the case her father had set down. "Then again, maybe he's going to have to learn to keep up with her."

"I tried for years to keep up with her mother." He cleared his throat to cover the hoarseness the bittersweet memory evoked. He slowly realized that, though it still hurt, it was a dull ache rather than the more familiar sharp stab. Somehow he had never thought that would ease with time. He cleared his throat again before continuing. "I wish Luke all the luck in the world -– he'll need it. Come on, Renee," he called, holding out his hand, "let's not keep Luke and Aunt Deanna waiting."

oxo

It felt good to be sharing a cup of tea with Will and Deanna again after a long day. He could almost imagine that Beverly had merely been called to Sickbay on some minor emergency and would be back soon. He darted a quick glance at Deanna as he pushed the thought away and refocused on the present.

"I understand Lwaxana was here recently. How is she?" Jean-Luc didn't even try to hide his smile as Will glowered.

"I never should have teased Worf when she took Alexander under her wing a few years ago," Will moaned with feigned remorse. "Luke adores her, of course, especially since she spoils him completely. Fortunately, Kestra is still too young right now."

The sound of a door opening drew everyone's attention. Renee came shuffling from her room, rubbing eyes that were open only enough to keep from bumping into the furniture. She climbed into her father's lap, murmuring a soft "Papa" as she snuggled into his shoulder. Jean-Luc settled her more comfortably, making sure she had a firm grip on her rabbit before covering her with the light blanket she had dragged behind her. She went back to sleep with a contented sigh.

Will smiled. How many times had Picard said he wasn't good with children? Apparently, with certain children - and one very special little girl - he was as good as they came.

Deanna, on the other hand, viewed the vignette through very different eyes. She relaxed a bit as she sensed contentment from the two, tinged with the sadness of a man who had thought he might never be a father, certainly never a single parent.

Jean-Luc easily read her expression. "It's all right, Counselor," he said purposely using her title. "She hasn't done this in several months. It's probably the change in surroundings." He dropped a light kiss on Renee's tousled head. "We're doing just fine."

"I know that, Jean-Luc," she assured him, "I can see it and feel it."

"You should," he murmured. "You both were instrumental in helping Renee and me survive all this. I have never cherished friendships as much as I have this last year. When Beverly died, I could feel myself shutting down. I wanted to hide away with my pain and sorrow, but none of you would let me do that." He paused, resting his cheek for a moment on Renee's head. "I will be forever grateful to all of you for saving me from myself."

Deanna again felt the underlying sadness in him, but she also sensed a renewal of the optimism that had been missing for the last year. Although it was not the one he had planned, he was once again looking to the future.

oxo

Epilogue

He moved excitedly back and forth in front of his audience, his voice carrying not only the strength of his convictions but his eagerness to share them as well. The lectures he gave on the Prime Directive were the most sought after classes at the Academy... and the ones most dreaded by Starfleet's upper echelon.

She listened as he dared to tell impressionable cadets the Prime Directive was strictly a guideline, that it should be adhered to but it could be, indeed must be, bent on occasion. He offered his own life experiences - the ones Starfleet had declassified - as examples of when to act and when not to and how to know the difference.

Sitting at the back of the lecture hall, Renee Picard wondered if he used his experiences in raising her as examples of patience. She had led that poor man a merry chase, interrupting important meetings as a little girl to show off her latest drawings or getting him called to her school because she was fighting. Her teenage years had offered scant improvement when they argued over clothes, her friends in general and boys in particular and trying to find a balance between her dancing and her schoolwork.

Those and the hundreds of other things that been putting parents and children in conflict for millennia.

Things might have been different if her mother had lived, but probably only because he wouldn't have had to bear the entire brunt of her tempestuous youth.

Luckily, they had both had Wesley. A smile curled the corners of her mouth as she recalled how her beloved big brother always managed to 'phase' in just at the right time.

She looked down to find she was nervously twisting the ring on her finger. Although the ring was new, the feelings behind it were not. As a fourth year cadet, she felt confident in her decision-making abilities, but she was certain her father would fight her on this one. Still, this one felt more right than any she had made in a long time.

The class broke up, and over the milling throng of cadets, he searched to make sure she hadn't left, breathing a small sigh of relief as he caught a flash of her fiery hair. Jean-Luc Picard tried to wave off the questions still being called out to him, but his students were persistent. "Enough!" he said sternly, and 75 cadets snapped to attention. "I have office hours posted. Use them." He waved a cautionary finger at them. "Judiciously." He let them stand there until he climbed the stairs to where Renee stood. "Dismissed!"

Jean-Luc hugged his daughter tightly. Between her schedule and his, they saw each other rarely. It seemed silly to send letters back and forth across the campus, but it was the only way to stay in touch.

He kept his arm draped around her shoulders for the entire walk to his apartment. Renee, being her mother's daughter, had finished the task Beverly had begun. Jean-Luc had gotten over his dislike of public displays, laughing more openly, greeting people more effusively, even allowing his closest friends to tease him about his former remoteness. Newer colleagues were puzzled by references to a rigid demeanor and solemn countenance, never realizing the enormous effort it had sometimes taken him to keep his promise to Beverly.

He knew this was no casual visit, but he allowed her to set the pace during the meal. The longer she took to get to the point, the longer she would stay. It was a tactic he had perfected with Beverly. Conversation over dinner centered on the Academy - his classes, her projects, graduation barely a month away.

After dinner, they moved into his study. Jean-Luc placed the tea tray on the low table and settled next to her on the couch. In a seemingly casual move, he picked up her hand - the left one. "So when are you going to tell me about this?" he asked. He watched the light play over the glittering band and looked up to see the same sparkle in his daughter's eyes.

"I'm getting married." She winced as the words left her mouth. So much for subtlety.

"Please tell me it's Luke."

The easy acceptance was so unexpected that it threw her well planned speech into a jumble. "Of course it's Luke. He asked me a week ago, and I said yes. We want to do it right after graduation. Everyone we would invite will already be here. Uncle Will and Aunt Deanna approve. I know you want me to establish my career first, Dad, but it really will be easier this way. We've requested a family ship so that we can take our first assignment together, and - "

A gentle finger on her lips stopped the torrent of words. "Do you love him?" He sought the truth in her face and found it.

"I've loved him all my life," she answered with quiet conviction.

Jean-Luc heard the certainty. It was the same certainty he had heard in Beverly's voice all those years ago. "Then marry him as soon as you can. Never waste a minute that you can be together. You and Luke come from four parents who let a lot of things get in their way. Mostly fear. My telling you not to be afraid is a waste of time, but I can tell you not to be controlled by it. Renee, I want you always to remember that Starfleet is just a career, it's not a life. The two of you will have to fight hard to be together, to stay together. I think I can speak for Will and Deanna when I tell you, if it ever comes down to a choice between your family - you and Luke - and Starfleet, that's no choice. Not even Starfleet is worth losing your family."

Renee hugged him tightly. "I'll do my best, Dad."

"I know, sweetheart," he said, kissing the tip of her nose, "I took that as a given."

oxo

The ceremony took place at the Picard vineyards and was the simple event her parents' wedding was supposed to have been. This time Jean-Luc insisted it would be family and friends only. Starfleet would dictate enough in their lives - this day was for Renee and Luke.

She wore her mother's wedding gown, and her flaming tresses, also her mother's, were worn in a style reminiscent of that long ago day.

The only sadness was that her mother wasn't here. She couldn't see another pair of sapphire blue eyes glow with love and glitter with tears of joy as her own had on her special day.

Jean-Luc caught his breath as he saw her reflection in the full-length mirror. She was the very image of Beverly, and his heart filled with joy, just the way it had on the day the woman he had loved for most of his life at last became his wife.

She smiled, then turned when his eyes filled with tears. In a rustle of silk, she hurried across the room to hug him. "Don't cry, Papa."

He would have made it if not for that. She hadn't called him Papa since she was twelve. "It's a family tradition, sweetheart," he said, returning her smile. "I always cry on this dress."

"I wish Mama was here," she murmured, echoing that long ago birthday wish.

"She is here, Renee, in you and me and everyone else who loved her." The sudden tightness in his throat caught him unawares. It had been a long time since missing Beverly had hurt this much. After another quick hug, he stepped back for one last look at his 'little' girl.

She was poised and beautiful...

...and her mother would have been very proud.

His own pride shining in his eyes, he held out a hand. "You're late, just like she always was. Come on, people are waiting."

oxo

Three years later, Jean-Luc held his day old granddaughter for the first time. Red-haired, blue eyed - Beverly Ann Riker.

The End

/o/o/o/o/o/o/

"Do not go gentle into that good night,  
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

Dylan Thomas


End file.
